Jul 26, 2008 5:18 AM
Here comes my cincaii rojak blogg!!!!
Farah cuzzen..!!! U soo bad... u make me miss My dad aLso..I miss ur Mom also.. Hmm.. Good people always go first i guess.??
I cannot imagine how fast time flies. My best auntie ever has already moved on to the other part of this world for one year already.. And my dad, almost one year. How fast time flies man..
aNd this year gonna be the first year i'm going to celebrate hari raya without my dad.
How i envy those people who have dads with them.I used to be damn close with my dad, just that i often tell him that i hate him for soing some things that i cannot accept.. aNywHo, he is still a good father tho'. I appreciate the days he is with us..He is still in and part of me and my whole family good memories..
I remembered last year asking my mom on the night of Hari Raya, why does she cry when she heard the Takbir thing.. She would say its a feeling that she would feel every time she heard the Takbir and its been like that since she lost her dad.
I guess this year would be my turn to feel what she had been feeling.. Hmm, how sad.. I just could not forget the last days of him at the hospital. I stayed up 24 hours taking care of him at the hospitals for near 7 days..aNd rite on the night of new Year.31st december 2007, 2015hours, his heart beat stopped. No movements, no reactions, i felt as if the clock had stopped ticking for a moment. aNd there i was shocked. can't believe what i saw. I remembered my mom cried . The nurses talked to me wether if there is anithing that i wan them to do for my dad's body.. I stood there and said no.. I tried not to let tears pour. i just squat somewhere near the corner and i heard my mom said,"baby, ayah dah takder, tgk ayah nie." at that point of time, I can't control animore, i cried and pour out every single tear i had for him. His the bestest dad ever who understands me the most and always give in to me whatever i want. I always get things that i want. I just lost him for that..
And for some reasons i felt angry too that day.. I just felt like killing some people that is responsible for my dad sufferings all this while.. I am a revenge shit person. I dun give a damn. When i want revenge, thats it..And till today my revenge had not faded yett.. Just wait for the moment okie people.. I will get the shit out of you. I dun give a bloody damn on what blood ties we have, if i hate u means i will hate u forever...
